House Rules.
First and Foremost, Welcome.
Now, guidelines.
Read. my scribbles.
Feel. my emotions.
Smile. for me.
Dance. in joy.
Comment. in my favour.
And if you don't already know,
Slip. on my banana peels. =P
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
It's almost the end of yr 2008 now, with only another 29 days to go!I think before the year ends, there's really something I wish to get off my chest.
October is long gone, November has just said its farewell.
I STILL HAVE NOT GOTTEN MY BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION... YET!
WOW. It's such a funny thing, when people just talk about it, but nothing's put into action? I'm not even talking about the strangers, hello! My best friends, right? OK, guess i'm 'over-reacting'. I just feel kind of pissed off.
Many important people to me have forgotten my birthday this year. This just shows that I'm not as important to them as they are to me. HELLO! Even my colleagues celebrated my birthday for me, like one day before my actual birthday! So, kinda shame on you, my best friends.
I can't say how disappointed I really am, I'm just at a loss of words. I've been thinking, hmmm... okay, maybe it's forgivable if they forget my 21st birthday. Anyway they already promised to meet up with me and celebrate with me soon, right? So that should be like having a belated birthday celebration or something, be content la, Janel.
Damn! How long already, ok? I just had another friend celebrating his 21st birthday, and all of you remembered his birthday as compared to mine. Wow, dinner and special secret party thrown for him leh. Hey, that's kannasai la, ok. You mean to say, your so-called 'meeting up soon' and 'celebrating my birthday' is just lip service to me meh?
I don't need it la ok! Don't wanna meet me then don't meet! Don't wanna celebrate then don't celebrate la! But don't keep giving me empty promises ok? How many times in my life you wanna disappoint me?
This is like, quite the last straw, ok. I am utterly disappointed and utterly sian with your damn lies! I don't even expect you to give me presents, and I KNOW I shouldn't even count on you guys to make me feel a tad special. Boy, I am so pissed. And sad.
Come to think about it, after feeling angry, all that's left is really the feeling of being insignificant to the people whom you've seen as so important. Now I've realised what I mean to them is so little.
Really, the only people who celebrated my birthday for me was my family members. And I really am very touched and I appreciate everything they've done for me. That's definitely putting their love in action, and not only talk and try to convince me that they care or they love me.
Come to think about it, my best friends, do you even know when I'm sad?
Do you even care when I'm sad?
Do you even bother to contact me to find out how I am coping when I'm sad?
Do you even bother to contact me to try and meet me?
You don't even have to answer these questions. I have it all carved in my heart. Please la. Everytime I try to meet you all, you all are always busy. Have you all ever thought about me?
Only when you need me. right?
Only when we need Janel to do something.
This is really hurting. AND i'm really unhappy with you all. I am fuken serious.
What I'm Feeling Now:
Angels Fall First - Nightwish
xoxo Jank